This week is Carers Week here in the UK.
It’s promoted by a group of organisations to raise awareness.
It’s something close to my heart because I’ve watched Mum care for Dad for 40 years and now we have Ashley.
Being a carer isn’t something you always choose to do.
It’s certainly something you can choose NOT to do and some folk do.
A catastrophic car accident in 1973 meant a life change for my family.
Drug regime, physical therapy, mood swings, and a complete lack of support by the local services really made life different for us all.
Concern for disability and Carers in Melbourne in the 1970’s was a far cry from what we have today.
Mum worked with the doctors to rationalise his meds and the Salvation Army looked after us kids until Mum was well enough. (I remember a large lady called June who took us to Communist Rallies….)
But that was the extent of outside help.
To list all of Ashley’s external support would be a chore.
The edited highlights are:
– an extension downstairs with ensuite wet room and hoist;
– ramps into the house;
– a car for hospital visits with an on-street parking bay;
– an allowance for Gill as his prime Carer;
– a bus to school;
– a local society that specialises in support for disabled kids which has included day car and parent courses;
– a coordinated health/social/education plan which ensure his rights are statutory;
– a rising bed for dressing etc;
Carers Week aims to raise awareness of carers, highlight the challenges we face and the contributions we make.
Which is nice.
They tell us to make sure our employers and GP know we are carers so that allowance and support can be offered.
I know “the job” has had an affect on Gill’s nerves over the years and part of my blood pressure problem was due to concern for Ashley’s medical care.
You see, it’s what we do. It merges seemlessly with Parenting so isn’t seen as an extra. Likewise my Mum’s efforts were just part of her marriage – not a special or separate affair.
But it does affect you. It’s tiring. It’s socially limiting. A day out is like military manouveurs and foreign trips are a headache. It has had an effect on our relationship but fortunately we agree on most things and discuss things we don’t.
So there it is. Caring. A joy …
